Actions Have Consequences

 God has some exciting adventures in store for us as a family and as individuals.  We are growing individually and together as a family as we prepare for PNG.  Sometimes in all the excitement and stress, we forget about the challenges that our kids our facing, too.

I just had a heart-breaking conversation with our son.  These last couple of weeks have been very rough at our house- attitudes and anger and just overall frustration with the kids.  We've had some good times, don't get me wrong, but we've had some more than usual tough times.  After a very rough ending to our school day, Andrew ended up being "sentenced" to the finishing his school work in his room and spending the rest of the afternoon cleaning it.  He was none to happy about having to stay there the rest of the afternoon.  After he calmed down, he came downstairs to get his stuff, and we sat down to talk for a few minutes.  I wanted to try to get to the heart of the matter.  I didn't just want to correct the behavior, but I want a better understanding of his heart.  I've been reading through the book Third Culture Kids: Growing Up Among Worlds to begin to prepare us for the transitions our kids will be experiencing.  One thing that really struck me as I read it was that many times the kids are not given the "ok" to be sad about leaving all they know. We don't even give ourselves permission to grieve over the losses because we are doing this move for God, and it is where He wants us.  We aren't sad because we are going but because we are leaving.  We'll experience very similar emotions and feelings when we come back to the States.

I know Andrew is really struggling because some of the things that have been the norm for us are no longer guaranteed.  We aren't doing co-op classes or even additional extracurricular activities because of our current schedule.  Andrew thrives on the expected and the routine, and I know change is not easy for him.  We sat down and talked.  He is sad about leaving his friends and homeschool group and all that he has known.  This has to be one of the hardest parts about leaving.  It really broke my heart because of the struggle he is going through to go with mom and dad on a mission God has called us on.  Don't misunderstand, he is very excited about the new adventure, but he is also terribly sad over the loss of friends and the unexpectedness of the unknown.  Please pray for us to be able to help him get through the transition of the next year or so.  Pray for our sweet, tenderhearted boy.  Pray we will have wisdom on dealing with the behavior and showing him appropriate ways to deal with the conflict that is very real and for wisdom in dealing with his heart.